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capturing the extrordinary moments in ordinary life

What is my story?

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I decided to take a little break from blogging to read a book, well, two books. Unfortunately, I don’t have time really to blog and read! I have piles of books laying around waiting to be read, calling me every time I walk by them! The first book I started is Seth Godin‘s new book Linchpin.  I actually picked it up thinking that it might get me excited about finding a new professional path and surprisingly, it seems to be doing just the opposite! I am taking another look at my present job (primarily because financially I am no where near in a position to leave) and trying to figure out if there is a way to create some new excitement and focus to the work I do there.

The other book is A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller. I have heard that he writes about faith and I am feeling the need for a little centering which for me comes through my faith. I am a few chapters in and so far he is talking about story not faith but I am really enjoying  it. What I’m taking from it  is the idea that discontent with life comes from lack of  a good story.  For example, here I have a full time job and a family but I find myself frequently thinking about photography and blogging. Why? Because my job has lost it’s story, I know how to do it pretty well and I don’t feel inspired or challenged. I love my family and they are my greatest source of joy but maintaining the status quo at home is not enough of a story for me. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I am unhappy with my life but I do feel like I spread myself too thin in search of something and I’m trying to figure out what that something is! Maybe I need a new story, same characters, just a new plot line.

Well, need to get back to reading as my one free hour of the day is almost up!


Written by realmom

May 28, 2010 at 7:13 am

Posted in working mom

Adoption: Is it for us?

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I first wrote about our journey way back at the beginning of March and, well, not much has changed! We are continuing to try to get pregnant with the basic efforts (temp taking and OPKs) and occasionally we talk about the ups and downs of adoption. I have done a some reading on the web but its only left me more confused and unsure about adoption. There are some wonderful posts about adoption from people who were adopted like Kristen Kardos at KIDOINFO and those who have adopted like Kelly over at The Miller Mix.  In fact the majority of information is positive. The problem is the negative stories are hard to ignore and seem to be getting in the way of really committing.

Ideally we would love to adopt a toddler but I have learned that the only way you can really do that is if you start out as a foster parent and hope that the mother is unsuccessful in getting her child back. It just doesn’t seem right to go into  a foster role with an agenda. If we didn’t have an almost four year old who wants more than anything to be a big sister, I think we could approach foster parenting with no expectations.  I would hate to put her through unnecessary heart ache at such a young age. If she were 8 or even 6 and could better understand the whole situation that would be different. Even then I’m not sure it would be worth it. So I don’t think foster to adoption is for us, not right now anyway.

And then domestic infant adoption seems wrought with uncertainty. First off, the  whole idea of selling ourselves feels very overwhelming. Then there are the stories of mothers pushed into making an adoption plan (amazingly it happens in this country too). It just seems the chances of finding someone who is sure enough of themselves to make an adoption plan with out regret is slim and then they would have to pick us out of the thousands of families waiting to adopt. And I can’t help think about those couples with no children and wonder if I should be competing with them when we already have an amazing child of our  own.

The main obstacle for us remains that any adoption journey is not a sure thing and as I said before, after being on the rollercoaster of infertility I’m just not ready to get on another rollercoaster. Maybe that’s why we just keep talking and haven’t taken any action. Maybe we just need a break. We need to recover from the first ride before we’ll know if we want to get on another one.

Written by realmom

May 20, 2010 at 6:33 am

the end of a magical day

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Written by realmom

May 17, 2010 at 7:01 am

And now for something completely different!

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Thought I’d try something new! Let me know if you like it or not!

I like the category tabs which you can click on and see all the posts in that category!

And please be patient as I get organized! Thanks for reading!

Written by realmom

May 15, 2010 at 2:27 pm

Posted in blogging

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Belated Mother’s Day wish, only because I’m WordPress illiterate!

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As you can see I haven’t posted in over a week and why you might ask? Because I have spent every spare moment I’ve had (which is not very many!)to try to make a nifty slide show with witty captions in honor of my most dedicated reader, my Mom.  Well, after thinking I’ve almost figured it out about five times now I give up! I love you Mom and someday I will figure out how to do it but not this year! This last effort really did me in as I spent quite a while ordering and putting captions on all the pictures only to get a slide show with no captions.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

And the captions went something like this:

Thanks Mom for making me feel like I’m the best mother in the world and for not saying anything when I forget to get you a card for Mother’s Day

(I did get you pretty cool book on Orchids, they just don’t sell cards at the bookstore anymore!)

Thanks Mom for teaching me to love the outdoors and sharing your favorite places with me.

Thanks Mom for loving my husband like he was your own son and not taking sides!

(even when you really want to!)

Thanks Mom for being there to hold a leg and take this picture. It was the best moment of my life and I’m so glad you were there to share it with us!

(you can guess which picture that is!)

Thanks Mom for getting her to take the binky and everything else in the early days! You saved my life!

Thanks Mom for introducing her nice and early to the TV

and the computer

and video games!

Thanks Mom for always being up for another birthday party

or a tea party

or just one more ride on the Merry-go-round!

Oh and Cheers!

And why did I spend all the time I could find to try to make a nifty tribute to my mom even though I repeatedly could not get it to work? Because of all the times I know she persevered for me! My Mom worked full-time her whole life  to provide a good life for my brother and I. She had some help from my Grandmother but she also took care of my Grandmother on her own for many years freeing my brother and I up so we could find our own way. We both found our way right back to her and her support when it came time to start our own families. She is one of the smartest, bravest, most beautiful women I know and I only hope I can be half the mother she was to me! I love you Mom!

Written by realmom

May 15, 2010 at 12:21 pm

Let yourself be silently drawn…

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Let yourself be silently drawn
by the strange pull of what you really love.
It will not lead you astray.

~ Rumi ~

Posted via web from Real Mom. Real Life.

Written by realmom

May 14, 2010 at 10:19 am

Back to nature in the backyard!

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When I first read about Backyard Mama’s carnival about connecting kids and nature I loved the idea but was a little overwhelmed about finding something to do in nature every single week. This weekend after Real Girl entertained herself in the backyard (about 30ftx30ft with no trees and a few flower beds), just wandering around collecting rocks and leaves, feeling the soft grass in her toes, I realized that connecting with nature doesn’t have to involve some elaborate outing. Connecting kids with nature is as simple as getting your kid outside and keeping the toys to a minimum. If you start early enough it seems almost instinctual that they will start digging for worms or collecting rocks. When I was a kid I always loved taking long walks in the woods with my Dad so I think it’s important to take the occasional trip away from civilization to where you can only hear, see and smell nature. But I’m relieved to realize that nature is also only a few steps away from the back door.

Written by realmom

May 6, 2010 at 7:45 pm

Posted in parenting

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